so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
