Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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