I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
