your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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