She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
