they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Randomize
