We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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