problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
No subtext here. People are naked.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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