is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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