Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
