at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize