Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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