btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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