i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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