I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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