I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Dignity is for republicans.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize