I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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