where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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