After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
