If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
