Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
