Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize