worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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