i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
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