He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
