I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize