i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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