Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
All I want is dick and wine.
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