I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
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