worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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