can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
