it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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