the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize