Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
