we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
