White coat. Heels.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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