DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
All I want is dick and wine.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
