glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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