The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
