I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
