i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
