yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
