Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
We have started to decorate penises.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
