I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
