how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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