Why are handjobs necessary in class?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
