is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
