this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
