You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
