highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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