god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
