Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
