Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize